Studies in Human Pathology

A Tale of Two Teds

The Strange Case of Compulsive Hunter and Fulltime Asshole Ted Nugent

Proof No. 654,871 that God doesn’t exist: Ted Nugent does (and thrives!).It follows that at the Nugent compound meat doesn’t come from the supermarket. Oh. no. In the Nugent tradition, the men go out and hunt their meat, and that’s no sissy figure of speech. But. wait, there’s a bonus. Ted, who claims with a straight face that he’s never done drugs and that he’s thrashed anyone who ever offered him some, is certain of another thing: killing animals for food and fun can also keep you clean. Yes, the ills ofsociety‑‑crime, despair, drugs. poverty—they will all miraculously vanish if people will just stay away from junk and go hunting, er, bow hunting, that is. So after decades of cutting a figure as an unreconstructed rebel, a visceral anarchist without a program, Teddy has arrived, to become, of all things, a wholesome, clean‑livingAmerican, a real stand‑up guy kids can look up to. In fact, as he never tires of saying, why do drugs when hunting and the outdoors are much greater highs?

[READ THE WHOLE ARTICLE HERE]

RELATED:

TED NUGENT: KNOW YOUR RIGHTWING SPEAKERS (CAMPUS PROGRESS WEBSITE)

 

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